![]() ![]() I get that feeling sometimes when I see something really beautiful… It’s almost funny, that everything that would make a normal person happy is what makes me feel the most sad” (77). Ali Standish does a magnificent job of describing grief in Th e Ethan I Was Before without sugarcoating anything. His parents encourage him to settle into his new life, but even the new surroundings can’t ease the constant ache he feels. ![]() He’s not exactly welcoming to Ethan and his family, but Ethan doesn’t mind. The family moves in with Grandpa Ike, who is living with his own grief over the loss of his wife years ago. After his third attempt at running, where his older brother Roddie catches him, Ethan’s parents decide to move the family from their home in Boston to Palm Knot, Georgia. He feels responsible for what happened to her and his frustrations fill him with the urge to run, to find Kacey and feel whole again. Ethan Truitt’s been holding onto his grief and guilt every moment since he’s lost his best friend, Kacey. “Sometimes we hold on to guilt or grief because it’s the last thing we have that ties us to the person we miss” (329). ![]()
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